“Merry Fucking Christmas”

I hate Christmas. I really do. I will have a very serious post on why this is so on December 26. But, for now, consider the following:

  • Yesterday, the basement flooded.
  • Last night the clothes dryer conked out.
  • Judge Ross died this week.
  • Thanks to the blood clots from Sioux City, my balloon foot hurts and I am now wearing black slippers with velcro ’cause their the only kind of footwear that works when your foot looks likes something from the The Island of Doctor Moreau. See below.

photo

  • My doc, educated at the Grace L. Ferguson Storm Door and Medical School, says, “not to worry” and than grins in his terrifyingly vacant way.
  • Yesterday, Petra, our oldest grandchild ended up at a Canadian hospital for her Christmas present. Diagnoses: parasites from China. See below. Thank you baby Jesus!

Petra

With the foregoing in mind, I offer you Denis Leary and Merry Fucking Christmas.  May it bring the true meaning of this blessed holiday to you and yours!

RGK

19 responses

  1. Funny, I feel much the same way! By the way, your foot looks horrible, just horrible! Can’t wait for the explanation about why you hate the holiday. As for me, I think I will mark the night with a long walk in the cold and a nice warm cigar.

  2. Oh, and one other thing I say under circumstances such as you find yourself in right now: Awww, fuck it all!

  3. Peter H.,

    I love Robin Williams, and you have now given me the best X-mas gift ever. I had not seen this bit, and it is pure genius. But, that is redundant,given Robin Williams’ unbelievable talent at finding the funny in raw truth.

    All the best, and fuck it all too!

    RGK

  4. In this season of joy and peace on Earth, we can all be grateful we don’t have anal seepage.

    Have a merry Christmas, and may your prescription for fukitol shield you from any prosecutions for poo bombing.

  5. Judge Ross died last week. On the positive side, he did live to be 94.

    Your grandchild imported parasites from China. On the positive side, you have a grandchild who has enjoyed the privilege of actually seeing China. It’s not like it’s any worse than a tonsilectomy.

    Your basement flooded. Your dryer conked out. Errrrr, welcome to the club. Dryers only last 5 years on average these days, and some of our neighbors don’t even HAVE houses any more.

    If a balloon foot is the worst thing you have to worry about at 67, it probably hasn’t been a bad run. In case you hadn’t noticed, the warranty runs out at about age 50.

    You not only have a job, but you have a job that is so interesting that you are willing to do it for free. So tell me again why your life sucks….

    Loved the video clip, tho.

  6. Your basement flooded. That means you have a basement, whivh means you have a home. You called a plumber. That menas you can afford to pay a plunber to fix the problem. Your daughter is in the hospital. That means she has access to first class health care and has insurance to pay for it. You are home resting your foot. That means you have a job that allows you to stay home when your health requies it.

    Merry Chritmas, indeed, Judge K.

  7. Yes, Bob, I have all of those things and that is because I am demonstratively special. After all, the high and the mighty stand up when I walk into a room.

    As it says (I am pretty sure) in the bible, if you can’t afford justice, you simply don’t deserve it. Or, as I like to say, poor people are icky.

    All the best.

    RGK

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